Sunday, February 05, 2006

Farewell fond ones


The board was put up with a twinkle of pride in everyone’s eyes, a smile on everyone’s lips and a sense satisfaction…something like when an event, a place and a feeling are established. But yesterday, we cleared the room, swept out the dust and snapped the wires holding the board. The whole place looked so empty and in less than half the time that we had taken to set it up, Paws and Claws was shut down. A loneliness gripped me as I penned down the notice of closure and I could only stand there a second when A and M looked back at the empty corners of the clinic where the other day only sounds echoed.

And with this clinic came to an end another very precious chapter in my life. It isn’t too long ago that I met A for the first time and the relationship matured so suddenly. The other day he told me that I was the first friend he had out-of-the-circle. I didn’t know whether to take pride in the statement or not, but I was glad nevertheless. I have spent a lot of time with this couple and have allowed myself to grow with the relationship. After a long time I found myself following my heart. I did as it told me; there were times when I realised that some things needed to be shared and other times they understood a lot about me without a single word being uttered. In fact I could see the relationship becoming more intimate. Everything took its time, but then again everything seemed to be happening at the right time.

There are some relationships that are hurried, while there are others that just remain, but very rarely do you sense a relationship growing. It grows with time and with every experience and event in your life. A & M’s relationship with me grew similarly. Every time we met was memorable…sometimes we spoke about their home, sometimes about Cranky, sometimes our friends and sometimes even about the placement of stars in the sky. One of the most beautiful things of this relationship was that we got to know each other as individuals. Over the past year I have realised how much of what I initially perceived was so different from what actually was. Of course, I enjoyed immensely those aspects of their personality that lay in the shadow of what I had glanced at first. A’s matured advice that lay a blanket on his habit of making impromptu thrilling plans and M’s composed self which at times gave way to her innocent stubbornness of wanting to eat an ice-cream.

We have gotten so used to each other … that I actually feel a vacuum now that they are gone. Since Dhanashri left four years ago, I haven’t really spent much time pouring over any of my relationships. Those poems I wrote about our relationship and the ‘better than best friends’ term we braced our bond with…well it began there and probably had ended there as well. But this time, I actually sat back and penned down a lot of stuff for A & M…Whenever I am actually unable to put across everything through conversation, I opt to write; it just makes things simpler and clearer with a neat flow of thought.

So here is wishing you the very best. I hope this opportunity works out excellently for you. I love you tons and I hope you are going to be equipped to compensate for all the weekends I have been without you, when you get back!

Miss you truckloads. Thanks for being always being there and more importantly making a difference by being there. I end … I sit back to watch Jerry Maguire…my favourite movie.

3 comments:

me said...

very personal beautiful writing..this one...nice going :)

K?K! said...

good.. i didnt think anyone but me to relate to this emotional jazz

mola said...

hey kolambi!
that was gr8.you always made us feel special being special yourself.you write beautifully.maks us feel like we are an important part of a well written romantic autobiography.
you got the exact emotions down on the screen as i knew you, perhaps, only you could.but never knew would.
and think i can relate to this emotional jazz:)
mola or nemo